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SERIAL Relationships are a KILLER

Ask yourself how many SERIOUS relationships YOU THINK you've been in. 1? 2? 10? Before you continue reading, go ahead and count. Then ask yourself how quickly do you get into serious relationships. After 1 month? 6 months? 1 year?

I've been in 2 serious relationships in my life so far. 2. The first was when I was 17 that lasted about a year and a half...young love I tell you lol. The second was when I was 21 that lasted about 3 years and produced my wonderful son :)

Now it's fair to say that what a "SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP" means is very subjective, meaning it's definition is different from one person to the next. So for argument sake, MY definition of a serious relationship is as follows: 

I was never the popular girl in school

Growing up, since kindergarten all the way up until I finished high school, I was never the popular girl in school.

Easter egg hunting or Dating?

On Easter when I was 12, my mom asked me to take my 5 year old brother easter egg hunting for his first time. We grabbed our baskets and began searching for eggs. Being 12, I understood the weight that eggs put on a basket so I only picked up a few. My brother on the other hand, started overstuffing his basket! I'm like "bro you can't put all of those eggs in your basket, you're going to break the basket." At 5 years old, he obviously didn't understand the weight aspect I was referring to. So he looked at me with a puzzled expression and said "Why not? The more eggs I put in my basket, I win and get to take all of them home". I replied, "if you continue putting too many eggs in your basket, it's going to break and you'll no longer have a basket". Still with a puzzled and now mischievous expression, he disregarded my warning and continued overstuffing his basket until....SNAP! I heard the basket break and my brother started crying because all of his eggs fell. Some eggs broke, some didn't. Being the mean older sister I was LOL, I walked up to him and said, "I told you not to do that! Now you have NO basket and you can't have mine. What are you going to do now?" I kid you not, through his tears he replied "fine, i'm going to grab my favorite egg and carry it home to show mom". I said, "but bro you just picked up over 15 eggs, why are you choosing THAT egg?" And he finally said, "out of all of those eggs it's my favorite. It has cool designs on it and it happens to have all of MY favorite colors!" 

Smart kid lol. 
Growing up, most of us experienced easter egg hunting. You search for different colored and designed eggs to put in your basket for fun or in competition. You may have to swap out and choose eggs over others because you know you can't keep them ALL. You know that if you add too many eggs to your basket, may cause the basket (and some of the eggs) to break. But at the end, there will always be THAT ONE EGG that shines over the others. 

Well the process of DATING is a lot like easter egg hunting. Think about it. You get to know different peoples' Flaws. Favorites. Hobbies. Family situations. Occupations. Goals. Pet Peeves. Weird shit they do behind closed doors. Everything possible you need and want to learn, to PICK the one person you potentially want to spend the rest of your life with.  Throughout the process you may drop people, get dropped lol, and hearts may break; but (hopefully) in the end you'll meet SOMEONE who will shine over the others. 

First-Date Sex

NEVER have sex on the first date, it's forbidden! .....Said by relationship experts, writers, authors, psychologists, therapists, and Steve Harvey all over the world.

Well not by I. Not here. 

In dating, there are many rules that people are supposed to follow that apparently some "dating genius" created with the outcome that you'll find your ideal soulmate. Some of them which we have all heard before include, "the man is supposed to pay on the first date", "no kissing on the first date", and yes "NEVER have sex on the first date". 

So why was this rule created. Well why are ANY rules created? To maintain human integrity and withhold human morals and standards. But we ask ourselves this question almost every time we're faced with a moral challenge: If there were NO morals and standards, would we still hold back and refrain from doing things that FEEL so NATURAL and RIGHT to us? Now this can be easily translated into why laws and the judicial system were created lmao but that's at the extreme level. Right now i'm talking about SEX and DATING.

9 ways to deal with Rejection aka the Wicked CURVEBALL

In the game of baseball, a curveball is thrown by the pitcher with the intent that the batter won't HIT.
Well in the game of DATING, a curveball is thrown by someone with the intent that YOU won't HIT!
Another one of Kay's famous analogies haha.

When someone rejects you, or what in New York City has been coined the term "curves" you, is embarrassing, sometimes heart-breaking, and terrible. It can happen when you're dating OR if you're already in a relationship with someone. Sometimes it happens unexpectedly and unfortunately it seems to always happen when you REALLY like someone. Bottom line is no one likes to get curved lmao. Nonetheless, it happens to the best of us! MEN AND WOMEN. (Yes women get curved too)

For instance, I vividly remember being thrown my first "curveball" lol. When I was in my first year of college 8 years ago, I used to see this guy on the train who I thought was the flyest and cutest thing walking. I wanted him bad! You know when you form a crush on someone you see ONCE so you pray and hope to see them again!? Well it was like that. I began seeing him from 1-2 times a week and eventually began seeing him daily. After what felt like forever of trying to muster up the confidence to talk to him, I finally did and said a corny "HI DO YOU RIDE THIS TRAIN OFTEN?" like I didn't notice the fact that he saw me staring at him almost every day lmao! Long story short, he told me I was pretty but too tall for his taste (i'm 5'11) and that wicked curveball lead to a STRIKE OUT! I was so hurt to the point where I started asking higher powers why I was cursed with height LOL. I eventually got over it with the help of a guy who saw my height and thought I was the sexiest thing walking, and I never questioned my height again :)

So to help others with rejection AKA the wicked curveball, I came up with 10 ways to deal with it:

Stop Faking, More Coming

Based on a study featured on ABC News, about 75 percent of all women never reach an orgasm from sexual intercourse ALONE and 15 percent of women never have an orgasm PERIOD! (ABC News Orgasm Study)


To the men that's currently reading this, the last woman that you had sex with probably faked her orgasm. And to the women currently reading, you probably faked your orgasm with the last guy you had sex with. Tough-Pill-To-Swallow lmao. 

Is dating single parents the new thing?

Before I became a parent to my son 5 years ago, I would NOTTT date or have relations with a man who had children. Not under any circumstances. If I found out a guy had kids, I immediately gave him the boot. Was that fair? Probably not lol. The last thing on my mind was sharing someone's attention and dealing with another man's mean ass children and crazy ass childrens' mothers. I thought about the impending and inevitable drama that would arise from a situation like that and I wanted NO PARTS! 

Well 5 years later here I am, mother to a 4 year old and currently dating as a single woman. If my son wasn't planned, i'd call it karma for all of the men with kids I turned down years ago haha. 

Nevertheless, the exact opposite of my karma happened. Now, dating a single parent is totally normal! (And to some, attractive) Nowadays, if you're older than 21 it's almost inevitable that you'll come across and date a single parent once in your life, if you aren't already a single parent yourself.

Is what the world can't see, NOT reality?

My grandma who raised me, is a 60 something retired woman who is very invested in the events that occur in my life, especially on social media. Which is just a fancy way of saying, she is nosey as hell and a bonafied lurker! lmao. So a few weeks ago, I received a phone call from her asking me if I dropped out of my Graduate Masters program. I told her no and asked her where she got that idea and she tells me "because I haven't seen you post anything about it on your instagram"....
First thought that came to my mind is i'm unfollowing this old bat asap lmao, my second thought was do I post that much?? And my third thought was are my grandma's thoughts, what everyone feels???

It's not a secret that Social Media sites such as Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter, and Facebook have become a major part of our society and culture. We literally take photos and videos of almost every moment that occurs in our lives and share them with the rest of the world. Literally....