Featured Slider

10 signs someone doesn't want anything SERIOUS with you

We've all been there. You meet someone. They're sexy. They have eyes that seem to sparkle and a smile that would light up a room. They're easy to talk to, the VIBES are amazing, and their personality is great! You feel like a winner when the level of attraction is mutual and you start thinking, "this is about to be my future wife/husband and the other parent to my future kids, SCORE!" lmao. You start getting to know and spending time with them but something seems off. Now you're left feeling confused and kind of sad because you thought everything was all good but now you don't know what's going on.

Well my friend. Sounds like this may be signs of the classic case of someone not wanting anything serious with you. Now don't confuse THESE SIGNS with the signs of classic friend zoning OR signs that a person just isn't into you. They differ because in THOSE signs, that person doesn't want anything to do with you AT ALL. In THESE signs, the person DOES want something to do with you... just not anything SERIOUS. So here's 10 signs that someone doesn't want anything SERIOUS WITH YOU:
1. There's no DATING involved. You go to their house. They come to your house. You have sex and have a great time together. But going out on an actual date is minimal to NONE and they never mention it or seem bothered by it. In fact, when you mention going on a date they disregard it completely.

2. They don't want to meet your parents or friends and have no interest in you meeting theirs.

3. They don't QUESTION who you're currently dating or having sex with.

4. They aren't INTERESTED in getting to know who you are and don't ask any questions about your life.

5. They don't mind seldom or rarely seeing you. 2-3 times a month is enough for them and they never complain about the infrequency.

6. They hardly text or call you. The only time they do is a simple "hello, how are you", "what you doing", and/or "are you free to come over".

7. They HAVE NOT, WILL NOT, and DO NOT mention anything pertaining to you and their future. Why do so... they figure you aren't going to be in it LOL.

8. They 're not exclusive with you. They date, talk to, and have sex with other people as well.

9. They LACK A SELFLESS attitude in dealing with you. Everything is about them and they don't allow you to make any decisions pertaining to the situation or "relationship".

10. They blatantly tell you that they don't want anything serious with you OR AT ALL. Now if you don't believe them or think you can change their mind... is on you. And a whole different story.

Anyone had an "AH HA" moment while reading this? LOL. Like I said we've all encountered this at least once in our lives. If you meet someone who you like a lot but have a gut feeling that they may not like you as much to want anything SERIOUS with you, than listen to that gut feeling; they probably don't. You have two choices: ASK them if they want anything serious with you OR pay attention to the signs and decide whether you want to stay or leave. ALWAYS REMEMBER, You can't make anyone want something serious. And your damn sure can't make anyone want something serious WITH YOU! Just move on and find someone who wants the same thing you do :)

SERIAL Relationships are a KILLER

Ask yourself how many SERIOUS relationships YOU THINK you've been in. 1? 2? 10? Before you continue reading, go ahead and count. Then ask yourself how quickly do you get into serious relationships. After 1 month? 6 months? 1 year?

I've been in 2 serious relationships in my life so far. 2. The first was when I was 17 that lasted about a year and a half...young love I tell you lol. The second was when I was 21 that lasted about 3 years and produced my wonderful son :)

Now it's fair to say that what a "SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP" means is very subjective, meaning it's definition is different from one person to the next. So for argument sake, MY definition of a serious relationship is as follows: 

I was never the popular girl in school

Growing up, since kindergarten all the way up until I finished high school, I was never the popular girl in school.

Easter egg hunting or Dating?

On Easter when I was 12, my mom asked me to take my 5 year old brother easter egg hunting for his first time. We grabbed our baskets and began searching for eggs. Being 12, I understood the weight that eggs put on a basket so I only picked up a few. My brother on the other hand, started overstuffing his basket! I'm like "bro you can't put all of those eggs in your basket, you're going to break the basket." At 5 years old, he obviously didn't understand the weight aspect I was referring to. So he looked at me with a puzzled expression and said "Why not? The more eggs I put in my basket, I win and get to take all of them home". I replied, "if you continue putting too many eggs in your basket, it's going to break and you'll no longer have a basket". Still with a puzzled and now mischievous expression, he disregarded my warning and continued overstuffing his basket until....SNAP! I heard the basket break and my brother started crying because all of his eggs fell. Some eggs broke, some didn't. Being the mean older sister I was LOL, I walked up to him and said, "I told you not to do that! Now you have NO basket and you can't have mine. What are you going to do now?" I kid you not, through his tears he replied "fine, i'm going to grab my favorite egg and carry it home to show mom". I said, "but bro you just picked up over 15 eggs, why are you choosing THAT egg?" And he finally said, "out of all of those eggs it's my favorite. It has cool designs on it and it happens to have all of MY favorite colors!" 

Smart kid lol. 
Growing up, most of us experienced easter egg hunting. You search for different colored and designed eggs to put in your basket for fun or in competition. You may have to swap out and choose eggs over others because you know you can't keep them ALL. You know that if you add too many eggs to your basket, may cause the basket (and some of the eggs) to break. But at the end, there will always be THAT ONE EGG that shines over the others. 

Well the process of DATING is a lot like easter egg hunting. Think about it. You get to know different peoples' Flaws. Favorites. Hobbies. Family situations. Occupations. Goals. Pet Peeves. Weird shit they do behind closed doors. Everything possible you need and want to learn, to PICK the one person you potentially want to spend the rest of your life with.  Throughout the process you may drop people, get dropped lol, and hearts may break; but (hopefully) in the end you'll meet SOMEONE who will shine over the others. 

First-Date Sex

NEVER have sex on the first date, it's forbidden! .....Said by relationship experts, writers, authors, psychologists, therapists, and Steve Harvey all over the world.

Well not by I. Not here. 

In dating, there are many rules that people are supposed to follow that apparently some "dating genius" created with the outcome that you'll find your ideal soulmate. Some of them which we have all heard before include, "the man is supposed to pay on the first date", "no kissing on the first date", and yes "NEVER have sex on the first date". 

So why was this rule created. Well why are ANY rules created? To maintain human integrity and withhold human morals and standards. But we ask ourselves this question almost every time we're faced with a moral challenge: If there were NO morals and standards, would we still hold back and refrain from doing things that FEEL so NATURAL and RIGHT to us? Now this can be easily translated into why laws and the judicial system were created lmao but that's at the extreme level. Right now i'm talking about SEX and DATING.

9 ways to deal with Rejection aka the Wicked CURVEBALL

In the game of baseball, a curveball is thrown by the pitcher with the intent that the batter won't HIT.
Well in the game of DATING, a curveball is thrown by someone with the intent that YOU won't HIT!
Another one of Kay's famous analogies haha.

When someone rejects you, or what in New York City has been coined the term "curves" you, is embarrassing, sometimes heart-breaking, and terrible. It can happen when you're dating OR if you're already in a relationship with someone. Sometimes it happens unexpectedly and unfortunately it seems to always happen when you REALLY like someone. Bottom line is no one likes to get curved lmao. Nonetheless, it happens to the best of us! MEN AND WOMEN. (Yes women get curved too)

For instance, I vividly remember being thrown my first "curveball" lol. When I was in my first year of college 8 years ago, I used to see this guy on the train who I thought was the flyest and cutest thing walking. I wanted him bad! You know when you form a crush on someone you see ONCE so you pray and hope to see them again!? Well it was like that. I began seeing him from 1-2 times a week and eventually began seeing him daily. After what felt like forever of trying to muster up the confidence to talk to him, I finally did and said a corny "HI DO YOU RIDE THIS TRAIN OFTEN?" like I didn't notice the fact that he saw me staring at him almost every day lmao! Long story short, he told me I was pretty but too tall for his taste (i'm 5'11) and that wicked curveball lead to a STRIKE OUT! I was so hurt to the point where I started asking higher powers why I was cursed with height LOL. I eventually got over it with the help of a guy who saw my height and thought I was the sexiest thing walking, and I never questioned my height again :)

So to help others with rejection AKA the wicked curveball, I came up with 10 ways to deal with it:

Stop Faking, More Coming

Based on a study featured on ABC News, about 75 percent of all women never reach an orgasm from sexual intercourse ALONE and 15 percent of women never have an orgasm PERIOD! (ABC News Orgasm Study)


To the men that's currently reading this, the last woman that you had sex with probably faked her orgasm. And to the women currently reading, you probably faked your orgasm with the last guy you had sex with. Tough-Pill-To-Swallow lmao. 

Is dating single parents the new thing?

Before I became a parent to my son 5 years ago, I would NOTTT date or have relations with a man who had children. Not under any circumstances. If I found out a guy had kids, I immediately gave him the boot. Was that fair? Probably not lol. The last thing on my mind was sharing someone's attention and dealing with another man's mean ass children and crazy ass childrens' mothers. I thought about the impending and inevitable drama that would arise from a situation like that and I wanted NO PARTS! 

Well 5 years later here I am, mother to a 4 year old and currently dating as a single woman. If my son wasn't planned, i'd call it karma for all of the men with kids I turned down years ago haha. 

Nevertheless, the exact opposite of my karma happened. Now, dating a single parent is totally normal! (And to some, attractive) Nowadays, if you're older than 21 it's almost inevitable that you'll come across and date a single parent once in your life, if you aren't already a single parent yourself.